I’m not conceited or consumed with myself. I just have a lot going on in my head. I write a lot about myself because these are things I would have never said. Sometimes I’m infatuated with the idea of infinity and others I’m not, but I can’t seem to get past the nots and that’s not what I want. There’s a million things that run through my mind and so much to contemplate. There’s nothing more I’d want than to elaborate on the fact that sometimes I don’t know who I am.
People are constantly telling me who I should or shouldn’t be, but why can’t I be me? I’ve had people tell me that I should pray about my views, but never once do they recognize the amount of prayers I have made. I’ve been told to read the Bible or that I’m reading it wrong, but why would I read it like you if it makes what’s right wrong?
There is no separation between who I have become and who God wants me to be. In fact, I now feel free. I still can’t shake my anxiety, but at least I can feel free to be me. There’s a universe inside of me. I find God there. I don’t need to sing some contemporary song. God is already singing within me. The breeze whispers songs and the trees dance with it. The stars are a spotlight and the moon is a disco ball showing off the divinity of all. I am enthralled.